20061230
trng today. like finally. haha never train for a week. haha miss mr loh!he's like slimer now. he's still as cute lah. haha if only he was my grandpa. how cute lah. haha! not bad today. quite fun. went lunch with huiyun and jamie. haha. then ya two groups of people came over to my place? two grps of friends? crash man, bt it was good lah. thank god. haha in the end we all had steamboat together. fun lah! drank teh again with sharon and zt. played with my hamster. zt was damm violent lah. bt he was save and lucky lah still haha love him.okay. im tired. gtg. takecare friends! goodnight. dont let bedbugs bite. god bless.
no one was at fault. i knew exactly where went wrong. the problem was with me. and i know clearly what it is :D
love huiping- 1:55 AM
20061228
today was alright. studied.. haha need to study more. and alright had a "class gathering". just four of us lah. bt was good enough. we had fun just eating and talking and laughing! haha really love them. moo, becks, dee and me, we went for steamboat. we went goldenmile. the food was good. haha.. then head to gardens for some ice cream.. moo is stil the same old him. everyone was still the same old them and i think i prefer it that way. will upload the pics later. its taking quite long..haha. so long people. god bless!
love huiping- 11:45 PM
haha today is cool. went shopping like never before. haha zoe calls me an implusive shopper. haha of course i wouldnt know what to buy, so just buy lah. had tuition in the afternoon. then met zoe and genia to shop. haha! we can shop soon again. after that we head straight to ij's farewell at huiyun's place. haha it was fun seeing everyone again! the sec4 leaving were all being dunk and all in the pool haha. took many pics. will upload later. i thank god for all my lovely friends! thanks amanda for that present! that's really thoughtful!! haha
reach home for less than an hour, met zt and eat porridge. haha we talk shit and nonsense as usual. drink two cups of teh. die lah. this time we wont be able to sleep. haha. went home at 1plus. watch tv and now online..
hope i sleep well tonight. dont torture me with the same dream over and over again. if only i can control my dreams.
god bless everyone on earth! :D
love huiping- 2:04 AM
20061223
haha suppose to study alot today. bt still have sleep alot and slack alot. haha and practice drums. i must get back on track and passion for everything! omg, my dad brought a new super big tv and a new com! ahaha yay!! have so many things to do! im going to die for my exams. haha cant wait for firdhaus to come ac man.then we can start our sengkang culture. haha plus weehong! haha we three can go mad tgt and train under loh!! haha shall pray very hard that they can get below 20 and come!! so exciting! ok set. ping, must study tmrw. must must must study no matter what k. set.. okay. set. haha!
my christmas and new year plus my birthday wish is for the whole entire world to be the happiest. sigh. why must people have emotions. dont know. ask god. okay. i will when i die. haha!
people don't know how much you know until they know how much you care. (coolies sentence) by howard hendricks
love huiping- 8:57 PM
20061222
trng today..not bad. back to sch again. was great to see them, esp ms neo,ms lim and all! cant wait for myself to get out of jc and come back to help!
okay. today, im here to talk abt my life. my life being a lesbian. im a lesbian for almost ten years already. ok lah. abt 7yrs. each time i tried to be better. bt things just dont work. out of those, there's only one person i let down. bt it doesnt matter alr, we are the closest of friends now. im glad. i think its tough being a lesbian. maybe its tough being a good one. maybe a bad one would be much easier? haha, i dont know. bt i definately lose hope in being one. this time, i think i tried my best.i think i really tried my best. i think i really did. i gave too much, way too much. i wasnt even myself. bt its ok. i was willing. oh well, enough of homo. i think it is time to end off my whole lesbian life.
haha this post is random i know. bt its to declare to the world that i was once a lesbian. not that im proud of it. bt just to declare that im going to try to get out of this. not another rs at least. once bitten twice shy. three times? four five? not enough? six? or seven? how about that. this is call zhi zhuo zhi shou in chi. haha.bt its okay. i have great friends great support and i have big dreams to work on. strenghtening my life all over and stronger all over again. i think i really let many people down. im really sorry, more than guilty abt it. esp ya.. if i have the chance, i really want to apologise. okay. need to study soon! will update again.. haha. and lastly, i hope anyone who reads my blog. no offence anywhere alright? peace out man. christmas is coming! so is new year!
love huiping- 8:35 PM
20061220
haha the weather is killing me. plus on mon i train in the rain and at night i was having sore throat and the next day not feeling very well.it was raining the whole day ok. dont know if its the weather or myself. i felt so cold the whole day. esp at night! even when im under my blanket. i guess im sick. plus the lack of sleep the whole month. haha dont know lah. im always like that. i think i need some thick clothing or jacket. and ya. i went for the scan on mon.. pray that i be fine. haha so that there's no need to attend my funeral.
i really miss those days back in sengkang. return sch ytd. looking at my juniors, how they grow up, physically and mentally. as in matured thinking. great leaders to be. looking at how firdhaus grew also. man, i was learning from him man. he taught me sth.i will rmbr it for life. looking at them, i look at myself again. oh my goodness, where have i been! dont know why when they ask me to speak, i dont really dare or feel like speaking. somehow i felt i lost my confidence and all. like you know..not like before? maybe it was the new school environment and all. i dont know. i guess i shall not be that vulnerable anymore. haha, i really love them alot! all the nonsense shit! jokes! cant wait for a's to end.
ok, i guess all my conclusion was wrong. all my questions, thinking everything. i guess i finally figured it out. (as usual, slow) im sorry :)
and i must must get down to studying. i must must must start studying!
and because of my friends, i must must move on.
love huiping- 12:47 PM
20061217
oh my! and so it was my birthday! a different and special one!
firstly, it was track camp.
camp was a real fun man! esp day one! had all the new people like suiying eunice james shar and afew lah.. cant rmbr their names. haha! bt they were great too! we had good bonding!
haha so it was games after games, getting wet and all dirty! we all enjoyed it!
then came the night where rain started.. and we couldnt really carry on with plans so we decided to take a night walk in sch! haha so funny! cause chia and this another person was like hiding somewhere to scare people! bt we expected it! so ya.. then we played water polo! haha as usual, yimei and i are always like enemies! bt not as meng as last time lah. her nose bleed damm alot lah! i was so worried for a moment! haha, then it was quite late already. our room totally sucks! we cant sleep there at all! it was infested with insects and crawy stuff! bt we wasnt really sleeping too. haha it was girls talk time! all of us emo-ing tgt in the toliet. me, yimei, swei, chirpy were talking and talking so much that time past so fast! like till 530am in the morning. haha! and guess where we slept, outside the gym... so glam lah.
next day, we started off with some water games too! haha, issac! haha the mummy thing! how fun lah right! issac was protecting me throughout man! haha! right right?! haha then it was the blindfold thing! haha how fun seeing me blind. haha too bad yimei left for work. if not we can have our showdown! haha then it rain quite a whole lot. so we had to put on hold many stuff. many of us were tired too! so everyone was like quite shagged. then the seniors came! wah, siyou's hair damm rocks lah. so punk now! haha!and we had buffet lah. eat talk eat talk..next we played captain's ball. wah, the game was so meng man! haha, many injured. haha then the game end, and i was talking to my senior asking abt next year and stuff. and wah... OH MY GOODNESS!! seventeen years of my life, a SURPRISE! it was them with a cake and the song! oh my, shock my to the max man! i almost cried ok! haha wah even more leh. yimei came with whip cream all over my face lah. i took my revenge! bt i kena a second time... nvm.. haha! and i gave bing a cake before i left for debrief. the cake was damm nice lah. cause it was a mango cake! haha! and we had a good closure with everyone sharing and taking part. and we reveal the angel mortal. haha, i was chirpy's angel lah. and omg, you cant believe this. i thought my angel was a girl, cause my angel wrote this thing which is like girl. omg, bt it was actually wenhan! how sweet! haha. and we all end it off with a cheer! i love my teammates even more now!!!! and i love working with swei! dont worry abt next year! we will all work hard tgt!
arh. then it was outing with shun and wei!! my ever loving friends!ok i love them like shit k! went chinatown and they shop with me. believe this or not, they brought me to the bra section at OG and told the assistant that i wanted to buy bra. i was like what? what the.. omg, i blushed like shit ok. so paiseh.. and i cant stop finding a place to hide my face. haha in the end i tried like six bra? omg, me? hp wearing bra.. haha! k lah. i brought one set lah still. haha, next we continue shopping and eating and shop and eat! and then we left. and i rush home and out again to meet sham dora. was suppose to go this cannery thing at clake quay. it was some clubbing place lah which i didnt know. bt we din go in the end. went to chill at town. spent the whole night playing pool at cine. till like 2am? haha! thank sham!!!
now came sat! sat was fun too!went out with sham and her clique to bugis and we shop the flea market! brought afew stuff lah! and talk abit with her friends! haha new start, must be sociable! haha yea. then i left for mol. was suppose to meet siliang, kokwei and liwei to go lah. bt they went into some trouble. so ya.. i was all alone lah. bt luckily, there's still estee and all lah. mol was good! and we went supper after that. me, bing, estee, swei, eugene, and this thrower. forgot her name! haha we went to gardens to eat eat eat and talk talk talk! you guys were great! took many pic! haha then we went to ice cube to eat ice cream. and then it was it again. with just that candle but yet so sweet! i love you guys!! and next we were suppose to talk. bt started talking again. haha it was so much experience to talk abt. haha i look at bing, bing look at me.. and we both just laugh lah! she can really talk alot man! bt it was not so bad as the camp. we talk till like 430? haha! and i walk home..
now the big day!! haha drums as usual. got 'scolded' by sir. sorry sir, i know this month is abit screwed and off for me, bt dont worry, i will pick back everything and gain my confidence all over and stronger again! sorry james! then it was another surprise! haha it was indeed a planned unplanned surprise. firstly, was suppose to meet wei. then she was late lah. so i walk around. haha and dont know why, i start emo-ing again. haha, anw. while walking, i saw joanne. so i talk to her lah. she was also waiting for her friend. so both of us wait tgt. then her friend came and she left. while i was still waiting for wei. met wei and we left for giraffe cafe! and so qiao i saw joanne and yanrong. so we talk abit. and so weirdly, we all left the place. and it became even more weird when pearly suddenly appear. oh my it was indeed fishy! i swear they din plan this! they planned sth else! bt still, they were damm sweet lah. and we ate and talk and eat and take pictures and it was cake again!!! yay! haha i miss them a whole lot lah! haha! wait for me to come back and we mug hard tgt ok!
then it was meeting up with my ever dearest friend, becks ko! i love her like shit too! after so many things that we went through. from aquaintant to friends to lovers to not lovers to friends to not so close and now, we are close friends! thank for being just there and there for me. all the talking, listening, everything! we went to catch a movie. the movie was lame lah. it was dejavu. haha. then went to play pool! haha though we played few games, bt it was fun ok! with all the photos taking and all. haha! and we walk town and take photos like non stop everywhere! haha! then we went to swesen and eat with her sis and her sis's bf. haha it was lots of fun lah. and her bf send us home! i love them too!
all the pictures will be uploaded soon. i hardly do this, so better take a look!
my goodness. has been a woah month for me. even as this day come, im finally seventeen. i realise im growing, im learning. learning even more. i realise, actually i am still the same old me after talking so much shit and nonsense to all my friends! they were the ones and they are still the ones. even new ones too! they were the ones who pick me up from pieces and yea.. i reaslise so many so many things man. haha.
firstly i want to thank those who wish me. thank you madeline, weehong, firdhaus, yanping, cynthia, becks, cynthia ko, zt, sharon, sham, amanda chua, amanda goh, stella, jamie, zoe, huajia, phil, pearltan, boonkwang, swei, estee, bing, eugene, that thrower, rachelmak, joanna, jacintha, vanessa, mel, sarahchan, weiting, pearly, shun, joanne, yanrong, angela, jiunlin, dhanuj, sam, yansheng, sandra, hueysi, jiarui, renee, anf my trackteam and every other single soul that thank me! i love you all alot alot!! i rmbr how i complain last year that my inbox have very little bday wish. haha there's alot this year!
secondly, i want to thank phil, my shifu that has always been there and there for me! shifu, you was there many years ago, you are still there now, you were even there when i was back to square one. omg, you are awesome! i love you phil!!! thanks for walking this with me!
next, i want to thank zt, zt arh zt. bro, haha! all the nonsense we can talk abt. thanks for waking me up, all the scoldings and waking. haha! some times, i thought that you are going to bash me up lah. thanks zt!
next is sharon. thank you for letting me stayover and stuff. i love you too!! we are greater friends now. with zt! right sharon?!
next is becks!!! haha i love you the most lah. you know me the best, you seen me thoughout! haha there's nth i can hide from you!so glad there we can be such great friends now ya know. haha!
omg, there's too many that i must thank god for. all of them, even my teammates as i start to get to know more abt them and bonding. pple like swei,chirpy and yimei and pple. they are one bunch of great and fun and loving pple!! haha as swei always say, "the world is crazy" i totally agree man! haha!
sorry if i didnt mention all your names.
oh ya! even my brothers! sl and gang! haha i love them too!!kw never failed to 'irritate' me with all his nonsense lah. love them!!!
lastly, i must must must thank is bing, i know i let you down many times. bt you never gave up. bing, im sorry. really thank you so much for everything! and the fun we had! really! i never knew you could sleep like a log! haha! i love you yb!!
oh well. so that was my bday. it was almost perfect.just sth lacking.if only..bt ya. its okay. im happy! i love you friends! and ya. my family too..
so long guys! enjoy!! arh. the longest entry ever..
love huiping- 11:57 PM
20061208
yes. its has been long. it has been pain. it has been amazing.
what is this becoming of my life?
call me silly call me stupid
how have i then realise ive been trying too hard, just too hard to please the whole world but myself.
years ago, you wanted forever, i want to give you forever.
but years later, you want to go, so now i will let you go.
please go, you know you deserve better.
because you deserve the best :D
oh well oh well, my job is almost done. its time i
let go.
have been too tired. too shag..
this blog is getting too emo. haha..so it shall be not updated till.... whenever.
im going to start a new life.
a life for myself.
please be happy your whole life!
love huiping- 11:46 PM
20061204
oh well ping, whats wrong?
its perfectly fine. be glad.
yea, i am :)
love huiping- 9:42 PM
20061203
if chocs can really release endolphins ( whatever you spell it), can someone just give me a whole ass f*cking chuck of chocs that can last me a lifetime?
bt i rather give this whole chuck of chocs to you :)
woah, how can i not learn to love my friends even more? you guys were great!
papa,mama you guys were great too. bt ma, you shouldnt have brought the nutella for me.
man/god/animal/insects/devil/whatever,
what is this thing that is in my head. i can no longer tell..
I don't wanna know If you're playin' me keep it on the low Cause my heart can't take it anymore And if you're creepin' please don't let it show Oh baby, I don't wanna know(i never expect that i really have to use this lyrics one day)
love huiping- 8:35 PM